Wednesday, June 30, 2010
I went to the trails to run today and I can’t tell you how painful it was trying to run with this rib injury. Every step was a stabbing pain, but the physical pain kind of took the focus off the pain in my heart, so it wasn’t all bad. I looked up some stuff online and talked to some people and I think I have a fractured rib or two. Actually, I think it’s in the cartilage, but according to web md, it’s still considered a fracture even if it’s only cartilage. It says it takes about 6 weeks to heal and that will be almost up to the triathlon.
At home, I keep praying and listening for God’s voice. I’m also really learning a lot from the Mort Fertel emails. It’s uncanny the way they seem to speak right to my situation. Today, I wrote some stuff down on paper and one thing was that I am to blame. I caused the separation in our marriage. I know it takes two and we both have a part in it, but I know that if I had been the man of God that Ceecee believed me to be when she married me that none of this would ever have happened.
It was really bizarre, but I prayed tonight about what to do about Ceecee and I felt like God told me to make things right with Brianna. She’s my daughter from a previous marriage and she lives in western Kansas. Things have been rough for a long time. I tried to get custody, but ended up agreeing to let her live with her Mom through mediation.
When she was in 8th grade, we moved from Kansas to Missouri and she said she was going to move with us. She didn’t, and her Mom has always tried to poison her against me. Since we moved, it just seems that our relationship has deteriorated to almost nothing. Anyway, I felt like tonight that God said to fix things with her, so I called her and talked to her about visiting. I told her I would make time for her and that I would do the transportation, even though her Mom is supposed to drive halfway.